Licasia
03-17-2003, 01:39 PM
In Honor Of St. Patrick's Day: Ireland Declares War On Iraq!
Saddam Huessein was sitting in his office, wondering whom to invade next, when his phone rings. "Hello Mr. Huessein", a heavily accented voice says. "This is Paddy down at Connery's Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I'm calling to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!" "Well," Saddam replies, "This is indeed important news. How big is your army?" "Right now", says Paddy, "There's Meself, Shawn, Michael, Seamus and the entire dart team from the pub. That makes 8 all told". Saddam paused and then responded, "Well Paddy, I must tell you that I have over 1 million men in my army." "Begorra!", says Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back".
Sure enough, the next morning Saddam's phone rings again. "Saddam, Paddy here. The war is still on. Me cousin Patrick & his brother Erin have joined us & also the local soccer team. So, there's 24 of us now. We also have some armor support, as we have Michael's tractor, Shawn's bulldozer and Patrick has loaned us two of his Taxi's." Saddam sighed, "I must tell you Paddy that I have over 4,000 tanks, 10,000 armored vehicles and I've increased the size of my army since yesterday to 1 1/2 million men." "Saint's Preserve Us", says Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you".
Sure enough, Paddy calls back the next morning. "Top O' The Mornin' to you, Saddam", says He. "The war's still on as we now have air support. We strapped a couple shotguns to Michael's Crop Duster". Saddam shook his head, cleared his throat and responded, "Paddy, I must tell you I have over 1,000 planes, capable of firing thousands of missles. I've also increased the size of my army again to 2 million men!" "Lord A'Mighty", says Paddy. "I'll ring you back."
Paddy phones again the next morning. "Saddam, me friend", says He. "I'm sorry to tell you that we'll have to call off the war." "I'm sorry to hear that", replies Saddam. "What made you change your mind?" "Well," says Paddy, "We got together at the pub last night & discussed it over a few pints and we decided that there's no fooking way we can afford to feed 2 million prisoners!"
Saddam Huessein was sitting in his office, wondering whom to invade next, when his phone rings. "Hello Mr. Huessein", a heavily accented voice says. "This is Paddy down at Connery's Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I'm calling to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!" "Well," Saddam replies, "This is indeed important news. How big is your army?" "Right now", says Paddy, "There's Meself, Shawn, Michael, Seamus and the entire dart team from the pub. That makes 8 all told". Saddam paused and then responded, "Well Paddy, I must tell you that I have over 1 million men in my army." "Begorra!", says Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back".
Sure enough, the next morning Saddam's phone rings again. "Saddam, Paddy here. The war is still on. Me cousin Patrick & his brother Erin have joined us & also the local soccer team. So, there's 24 of us now. We also have some armor support, as we have Michael's tractor, Shawn's bulldozer and Patrick has loaned us two of his Taxi's." Saddam sighed, "I must tell you Paddy that I have over 4,000 tanks, 10,000 armored vehicles and I've increased the size of my army since yesterday to 1 1/2 million men." "Saint's Preserve Us", says Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you".
Sure enough, Paddy calls back the next morning. "Top O' The Mornin' to you, Saddam", says He. "The war's still on as we now have air support. We strapped a couple shotguns to Michael's Crop Duster". Saddam shook his head, cleared his throat and responded, "Paddy, I must tell you I have over 1,000 planes, capable of firing thousands of missles. I've also increased the size of my army again to 2 million men!" "Lord A'Mighty", says Paddy. "I'll ring you back."
Paddy phones again the next morning. "Saddam, me friend", says He. "I'm sorry to tell you that we'll have to call off the war." "I'm sorry to hear that", replies Saddam. "What made you change your mind?" "Well," says Paddy, "We got together at the pub last night & discussed it over a few pints and we decided that there's no fooking way we can afford to feed 2 million prisoners!"